I N L I M B O

IVE finally finished putting my reel together, called all the production companies... and tomorrow... i mail em out.

im stressed.

ive been told i have a fair amount of confidence... probably more like cockiness. and i supposedly possess it in spades. even so, im more than a little worried. what if i dont get any work out of this? what if no one even calls back to tell me im a hack? was all this effort and drama for nothing? what then? what do i do?

this isnt a joke. im not angling for ego massage (i get plenty... thanks chris ;) i am seriously concerned. this kinda is my future after all...

bit of a step here.

i guess i just do what ive always kinda done. keep calm and carry on.

i still have the scripts (dont breathe underwater and marathon)... but not getting work as a director would be a bit of a set back at the moment. demoralising moments have a tendency to wear on you...

oh well. be that as it may... im working on dont breathe at the moment... well, not THIS moment... but im working on it instead of marathon, and now that ive gotten dont breathe more or less straightened out it feels... right. finally. im not sure how much longer its going to take to get it completely together, but i am making progress... and its honestly been tough. like ive said a million times, its always so hard to write about something so close to home... but finishing this is turning into a way of getting on i guess... i just hope its funny. i think it is. the best thing to do in a comedy is punish the shit out the main character isnt it? mission accomplished then :)

im watching shizukanaru ketto (the quiet duel, 1949) directed by kurosawa akira. its fucking amazing. only six years into his career and he was already producing master level works... christ. i mean, its not perfect (the premise is quite far fetched) but the story is told with such a deft hand... im simply in love with every frame. and to think that they had pretty terrible equipment in japan at the time... i really dont know how they did it. its a shame too few people have been exposed to japanese cinema (or just asian cinema in general). i mean, i have no illusions, i know i havent seen NEARLY enough... but, jesus, what ive seen so far... i cant even explain it. its just beautiful.

alright, ive gotta go fold resumes and print shipping labels. see you soon.

-jrh

ps. listen to some feist will ya?