free write iv

i can hear, i can feel the warm breath of bones. the cool breath of dust. and it will astral project. it will find itself a phosphorescent cloud in the sky. it will reach out with lights, with arms with luminescence. it will want to touch the ground it will try and find me. but i won't be for want. i won't be digging holes in the ground. i will welcome it's quaking firecracker fingers. i will let it pull me up to the haze. and i will see.... i will see what ive always seen and i will fall. back to earth, and it will take days. it will take days until i find my way, i find my way between the hills. i still have dreams. and dreams seem to be all i can talk about. i find myself longing for dark. i want it to come in robes. i want it to come alone. share a little drink with me and chase the day away. i will let it fall. let night fall down my throat and through my lungs. because i... because i want you out of my blood. i would spill it if i could. if i was a glass. i would simply spill it. fill the tub. stop the drain,and im sure we could lazily bathe. we could bathe. we could bathe. and we would be made, made for sheets and other clean things. but there are things much more simple and hidden. im not sure, but i think you can play the keys, if it's not the keys then im lost, because i hear the buz. i hear it on the wind. it's calling "im calling for you motherfucker." i can hear it hear me. and gone. gone gone gone gone from this dirt. this dearth. this mirth. there were, there were... iwant there to BE. i want the future. i want the future like the future creeps. it moves along at a suggested speed. plead. breathe. and i can see us. i can see it. and i want. i can stall. i can find my way down the stairs and flip stones. flip the concrete and find the ants falling in waves. i wish i could ignore this. i wish i could just run to the sea and stare at the sun. i wish it would lose it's teeth. find this animal stalking the brush. and its teeth wouldfall, not one by one, but as a curtain falling on a stage, during rehearsal. but im pausing for too long. i have to watch the sky. i have to collect the dust. brush it away, i have to keep warm. i have to keep cool. there are things i kick with my toes and things i flick with fingers. but most of all there are things ive spent. ive spent my luck. ive spent my trust. and ive taken off all of my clothes. ive found myself nude. and ive found myself gone in front of you. and there are bones reaching out for me. there are tears tearing me apart. there are things i wish i would have never said (as much as i know thats a lie) i would haveswallowed them for us. for you. taken them like stones. swallowed and out to sea. swallowed them like glass. break the light and swallow the shards. and it will glow. i will light. and i will dig. and i will lie. i will lie and look at the jellyfish dancing /moaning/glowing in the sky. a spooky action at a distance.